[One of the greatest injuries that Liem still harbours, and that still hobbles him despite his earnest efforts, is the consistent refusal of any of the people he’s loved in the past to put him first: his family, his church guardians, his friends and lovers. The fact that every one of them had good reasons for their choices only makes the scars more difficult to erase; how is he to believe that anyone would ever choose him, when he cannot even believe the people whose devotion he wanted should have?
And this not only hurts him more, but maligns those who would care for him as well.
His brows knit as Set pulls him relentlessly nearer, refusing him any space between them. The corners of his mouth pull down, a little a little defensive, bruise-tender, despite his efforts to pretend otherwise.]
Of course I expect it.
[Though he attempts to stick wholly to pragmatism, he is deeply unhappy to discuss this topic, and cannot entirely hide it. He directs his attention at Set as the god demands, but some old sullenness dwells in his gaze, like he doesn’t appreciate being forced to state the obvious in this way: like the act of offering him something he covets is just a ploy to be made conditional later. Still hooked around Set’s back, Liem’s hand curls into an uneasy fist.]
I don’t want to ask for anything more. I didn’t say I am lonely.
no subject
And this not only hurts him more, but maligns those who would care for him as well.
His brows knit as Set pulls him relentlessly nearer, refusing him any space between them. The corners of his mouth pull down, a little a little defensive, bruise-tender, despite his efforts to pretend otherwise.]
Of course I expect it.
[Though he attempts to stick wholly to pragmatism, he is deeply unhappy to discuss this topic, and cannot entirely hide it. He directs his attention at Set as the god demands, but some old sullenness dwells in his gaze, like he doesn’t appreciate being forced to state the obvious in this way: like the act of offering him something he covets is just a ploy to be made conditional later. Still hooked around Set’s back, Liem’s hand curls into an uneasy fist.]
I don’t want to ask for anything more. I didn’t say I am lonely.
[Even though he is.]