sterngaze: (Default)
Liem “sock-wearer” Talbott ([personal profile] sterngaze) wrote2022-05-01 04:42 pm
Entry tags:

kenos | inbox

Liem Talbott
communion · mail · action


Liem's mindscape is dark; quiet; contemplative. Any feelings or sensations that Liem doesn't intentionally project himself seem distant, as though echoing from a far-off room. Following any given sense to its source is bafflingly difficult.
redsoil: (pic#16220805)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-09-25 08:06 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Set's hands curl, uncurl. His claws come to bear as he squeezes the life out of an imaginary foe — his pacing sharp and fluid, circling the sides of Liem's bed like a shark that is desperate for a catch. For blood. His eyes wide, dark pupils thinned to cat-like slits; an atmosphere of threat, but also the image of a stricken man. One who had been desperately trying to rest his mind, because he has spent so long considering what to do next. How to retaliate, how to be decisive and precise in his blow, so that nobody would ever think of doing such a thing to him again. ]

The last man who threatened my son was Osiris himself. And I killed him.

[ The words are hollow. ]

Gen wants to die, more than anything else. He wants Zenith to win, he wants to die, and he loves the shard of "Reiji" most of all. These are the facts I am working with. I want to ensure he never gets anything he wants. I want him to live forever, I want him to be forgotten by Reiji. I want him to regret betraying our promise to one another!

[ There are so many ways he could have done that, if this was Egypt and he were a god. He could curse him, right now. He could summon enough power, he thinks, and lay a curse upon Gen that as long as he loves Reiji, he will never know the peace he desires most. That way, Gen would have to abandon his love to get what he wanted. ]

I want to find the shard of the one he loves, and I want to punish the person he loves. I want to control him using that love, the way he controlled me.
redsoil: (pic#16220878)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-09-26 05:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[ In his core, he knows better than to wail against Anubis's involvement. This is war, and he knows all of the rotten things people will do to gain power and become victorious in war. As a war god, he is so infinitely pleased to see the lengths to which people will go — it fuels him, feeds him, empowers him! And as a father, he wants nothing more than to see his child left innocent of it. Not used ( again ), not abused ( again ), not made to suffer ( again ) for the crimes and failures and weaknesses of his father.

Set holds handfuls of his hair, winding his fingers into the red length like he needs to grasp something to ground himself. Tugging at the roots inflicts a little burst of steadying pain, better for him now than it would be to slip into his favored seat in the alleys of the Last Dance and imbibing drink and drug until his mind was faded and rotten. His teeth work at his lip, even as he hears the sound of Liem shifting below his covers.

Slowly, he peers through strands of red — an injured beast unwilling to slow down, unwilling to rest because it feels unsafe. ]


He is the reason I did not go to Zenith, at the start.

[ With Liem, he feels he can be honest. ]

We made a promise to one another. That I would atone for my crimes against the natural order, and he would wait. He would wait for me to "come home". I am not capable of being Meridian, without that promise. I am false.

[ A fake, a heretic, something waiting to betray everyone.

Even Liem, who he steps closer to. Whom he settles on the edge of the bed next to, subdued and wrung out. ]


Do not be sorry for what you did. It is the nature of war, to use and be used. And I am a magnificent weapon, whether I am willing to be wielded or unwilling.
redsoil: (pic#16533597)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-07 10:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Two halves of an arch, bowed in support of one another. That was how Liem had described 'friendship'; it was not that he did not comprehend such things, for between he and Isis had been a long, devoted companionship that he had imagined stronger than any force in the world. A bond of their choosing, different from that of marriage. Something more like what Ra had described, when she had claimed that goddesses had been made with the right to choose among gods again and again, unhindered by marital bonds. By human shackles and chains.

His hand fits into Liem's, when taken. Smooth fingers pressing across his palm, gathered so gently. ]


Of course I would have. Like you, he matters to me beyond the trappings of faction and victory.

[ Like Rudbeckia, goes unsaid but equally obvious. He devotes himself to guarding her from the battle she wants no part of, and she rests with Meridian because that is where Set is. Even Liem, had he remained with Zenith, would have been mourned but accepted; some people were just worth more than the side they found themselves on. And Set had always been a traveler of far, foreign lands and people. Always sought understanding, even among those who would become his enemies or were immediately antagonistic to him.

It hurts, to think that Gen could drift further from him, and it wasn't even his fault. ]


I sent him there, where he wanted to be. Whatever happened to him, he thinks he is only worth ending. I think he is so painful, Liem. You are painful too, in another way that wants me to be close to you. I am a god, and one of the only ones. I have to feel the weight of your lives once again, and love you in secret.

[ He says it, like he's been punched in the stomach. ]
redsoil: (pic#16765274)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-09 10:14 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He was not made for good things, he knows.

In choosing those who are difficult to love, he admits to being difficult to love. There is little difference between him and Liem, in the way they have been loved and come to understand that painful little thing that eludes them. That comes to them in the form of obsession, lies and withheld rewards. ( He loves his son, unconditionally and madly. Anubis has always been the recipient of a love that will kill Set, a love that he would die for gladly, but has chosen to live and suffer to grasp. )

Is it any wonder, he claims to love Liem? Gen? Rudbeckia? The most difficult, painful people he knows. Those who think themselves unworthy, impossible to love.

He leans into Liem, folding the hand that tightens against his between his fingers. Like holding a frantic bird that wants to take flight before it is safe. His face turns, haunted and strained and wishing he had just one more petal. One more piece of Yima's calm, starry blossom to rinse away the storm of his emotions and the madness within his heart. ]


I have. [ Simply admitted, without apology. ] I am also something difficult to love. So, I understand.
redsoil: (pic#16220822)

nOOOOOO WIEM

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-11 04:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Closer still, Liem falls. Set wonders if he thinks of the man he mentioned once. His father, who haunts the shadows and dogs his memories and seeks to hold him captive and "love" him after molding him into a shape that is desirable. As if Liem as-is is not desirable, a stern and solemn man who seeks to do well by people even if it means becoming something unclean, unwholesome.

They're a little like one another, he and this man. More different than the same, but he does not relinquish the soft places where he finds Liem's fears and insecurities. He'd rather slip his claws into them and hook so deeply he leaves scars. What he asks from Liem is friendship. It takes no mandated form, and exists only as the spoken agreement: that yes, we are friends / yes, that means all that will come of it. ]


Of course I would.

[ He turns a little further into Liem. Body still primed for motion, forced into tense stillness. Like a stone rooted to the world itself, firm and unmoving, as he slips one hand free of where he cradle's Liem's fingers and slips it across his waist. To pull him in closer, mouth finding the spot high on the corner his forehead. One of the best places to rest one's mouth, to whisper against. A place known, divinely, as the temple. ]

Openly, too, if that would please you.
redsoil: (pic#16220792)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-11 05:55 pm (UTC)(link)
[ He does not expect the thing that Liem hopes he'd wear to be taken from his own hand. The scent of magic soft upon it, unknown in quality but unmistakable, as he takes the thin piece between his fingers and looks at it. For a moment, he turns it over around the tip of his finger, thumb working over the gems curiously. He measures it, and finds that it fits well over the smallest of his fingers — he is a little larger, broader, than Liem.

Without a word, he slips it down to the root of his finger, and crooks it up so that the other man can see where he's placed it. Proof of given word, and evidence that he meant what he said. ]


This is a new piece.

[ He knows Liem likes beautiful things, ornate clothing and accessories. They share an earring pair, one of Set's most thoughtful of gifts to someone else in recent times. ]
redsoil: — PLEASE CREDIT! (Default)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-12 04:28 pm (UTC)(link)
[ The people of his land wore jewelry in various forms, with various meanings by social station or insular community; the gods wore ornate pieces, exquisite and intricate and often impossibly-crafted. Set had been a man of practical tastes. Plain golden bands, the weight of the broad collar around his throat. Things that served as emblems of his stature, but were understated and doubled as defense. To wear the delicate little ring upon his finger was a first. He would not even begin to imagine common connotations, beyond that it is something Liem saw fit to give to him.

A gift, from him. A bit like a claim, maybe. ( He does not want to misconstrue, does not want to pretend it is something more than it is. But, he thinks back to the afternoon spent burning the dead, to the weight of their suffering in his mind and mirrored on his body and the way Liem had gathered him into his arms and let him cry, shameful and vulnerable in a way divinity should never have been.

Set's generation was painfully human, in so many ways. Even now, as he tries to shed it and be stronger, wiser, better. A evil, wicked god. But a god for people, nonetheless. ) And right now, he is so — there is so much swimming within him. A clear agony, a visceral pain at the reminder of his son's broken life, the fragile clutch of the vow made together. The jars exist because Osiris did that to him. He brings Liem's hand up, to his mouth, holding the curl of his fingers in a way that keeps the ring caught against the light like a statement. ]


And you will be all right, without it? You cannot take it back now, you see.

[

He won't let him. It's too painful to think of things like love and gifts with such simple, yet intense, meaning.

Amidst the pain and wrath, he feels something that aches — hollowly, like a space that had rotted long ago being coaxed to remembrance. ]
redsoil: (pic#16427628)

"and how long have you been seventeen"

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-12 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Over a century?

[ That is — a period of one hundred years, as he recalls.

Time is a difficult thing for him to keep track of, to be fair. Even in Kenos, where he is bound more to the ebb and flow of linear progress, his mind cannot grasp it without feeling strange, feeling untethered. Liem could be twenty-five, could be a century, could be twenty-five centuries and it would not quite be recognizable to Set; what he understands is that it is a long life, longer than most. That humans are often hunched and wrinkled and succeeded by generations of their own by the time a century has passed.

Slowly, he curls his legs onto the bed and shifts his hips. Drawing deeper into the mattress again, though he badly wants to pace. Wants to fling himself out the window and find his child in the dark of the abyss beyond the edge of the island. Right now, he has to lean into Liem. To press the line of his shoulder along the other man's and try, desperately, to allow himself comfort and understanding. To remain. ]


You are so young, yet older than most of your peers. A difficult position to find yourself in, I bet.

[ The back of his hand, ring gleaming, finds the plane of Liem's cheek. ]

— I am leaning upon you, too. Right now, most of all.
redsoil: (pic#16220876)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-15 12:55 am (UTC)(link)
[ Energy burns just under his skin, fraught and strained. He twists further into Liem, hands dropping to either sides of his hips, fingers inching forward across bedspread and mattress until Set's forearms bracket Liem's waist and he can bear his weight across him. Crooked against his chest, neck craning so that his mouth can find the gentle curve of the man's own. To draw tongue across the bottom lip and push the bridge of his nose across Liem's, forehead resting against his.

Trying to be in his space, to do something with his wild energy. ]
Am I keeping you awake, now?

[ Even if he does not sleep, he won't tire. As a god, he is notably diminished, but the presence of the ring will assist him. More than that, it will mark him for Liem's eye. ]

I do not want to go.
redsoil: (pic#16459224)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-18 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
[ There is a miserable sort of fondness in him; an ache, as he finds himself increasingly attached to lives he never really would have, had he never come to Kenos. He finds most people difficult to settle with, to find something within them that resonates strongly and invites his attention. Whatever Liem Talbott is made of, it sinks within him easily and simply. Causes his chest to constrict and his heart to flutter, as he slides his hands down to Liem's waist, to his hips. Pushes himself into him and spreads him back against his own mattress. ]

Are you still haunted by what you see in the shadows, Liem?

[ By his father, he means. By someone who sounds so like Osiris.

The non sequitur might seem abrupt, but Set's mind has always juggled multiple things with ease. And he flits from topic to topic without a break in his own logic, sweeping his warm hands across Liem's belly as he bows his head into those cool fingers, touching him gently. Another kiss, and he extends a hand out to the empty space in the room — curling his fingers as a burst of Meridian's light flickers in his eyes. Soft starlight begins to illuminate the room, the scent of foreign spices and the murmur of a voice — a woman's deep, husky voice singing a lullaby in a foreign, dead language. ]


I will stay. I do not think I can sleep, but — my thoughts are quieter, with you.
redsoil: (pic#16220822)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-22 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Perhaps that is why Set asks. Because in moments like these, he is haunted and stalked by a man who lied to him from the dawn of time; a man who led him to believe that he was pleased by him and happy for him, when really he coveted Set and conspired to possess him. He finds it hard to trust, when the back of his mind still whispers in Osiris's voice. When he is still a liar, a cast-aside god bearing the brand and domain of evil. ]

When you are afraid or in pain, call to me. I was — once, I was a protector god. I may be evil now, but sometimes my body remembers.

[ He would come to Liem's side: a guardian, who had burned bright and fierce in defense of those who dwelled in Egypt. Great and small, old and newborn. He had traveled far and wide in the world he'd known, and met with other pantheons to broker agreements and do battle with their armies when needed. He had never wanted to conquer, only protect. To challenge and thwart, through might and trickery and negotiation.

He tips down toward Liem, bracing his warm weight across him as he kisses across his mouth, his cheek and to the space next to the crease of his eye. A hand sweeps down his body, broadly spreading across his thigh. ( You can be insatiable for me, he thinks within his mind, in Communion directed into Liem's own. A favored thing of his: talking aloud and between minds, simultaneously and effortlessly. I know you are greedy and wanton, and I adore it. ) ]


I could remember it better, for you.
redsoil: (pic#16533598)

[personal profile] redsoil 2023-10-24 01:15 am (UTC)(link)
Yes, I would.

[ Set's hands trace the cool, pale skin of Liem's chest; his fingers trace around the shape of his Shard, the end of a well-kept nail flirting with the edges of it. His own Shard is bare upon his chest when the tumble of his hair and the heavy weight of gold jewelry shifts aside — an unpolished gash of red jasper like a laceration over his heart.

He bends his head, and presses a soft, brief kiss to the lovely compass points embedded in Liem's chest. Hands in his hair can be alarming, but Liem has never pulled at him with harsh intentions. Even if he had, it would be a matter of correcting the injury — to be able to keep him. ]


I am here, real and yours. I will listen attentively for your voice.

[ Pain still lances within him, but slowly, Set pours himself into bed alongside Liem; he rests on his side, hand stroking across bare skin and up into Liem's hair, thumbing against the corner of his eye and the arch of his cheek. ]

In this — I get to choose you, as you get to choose me.