I love me some gen threads, especially funny or drama-filled ones, but I am also shamelessly here for shipping AUs. The general Liem-shipping vibe is "I want more than this, but I shouldn't & they can't possibly want me back," so if you're into that, I've got what you need. His default setting is very D&D-like high fantasy, but I'm comfortable playing him in modern fantasy settings as well. Pretty much any prompt can also accommodate Liem being a full vampire instead of a dhampir, if that's your thing.
Prompts for inspiration:
• Arranged Marriage: Liem's shady vampire family has arranged his marriage to you, but he seems a rather reluctant fiance.
• Bodyguard Shipping: It's Liem's duty to keep you safe and out of trouble, possibly despite your best efforts.
• Companion to Royalty: Reclusive vampire king Liem and YOU! Are you a gift from a local power? Sacrifice from the townsfolk? Or did you just stumble up the road to his castle during a storm?
• Enemies to Lovers: Maybe Liem is a foreign agent trying to sabotage your country or organization. Or maybe you're rebelling against the current regime and he's trying to take you in.
• Fake Dating/Fake Married: A relationship is your cover story while you're travelling for some secret reason. Gotta keep up appearances.
• Hunter & Hunted: Are you a hunter trying to track Liem down? Or a snack that proved more than he bargained for?
• Hurt (Comfort Optional): Whether he's hurt, sick, drugged, or just upset, two things remain constant: Liem needs help, and he doesn't want to accept it. But maybe you don't want to fix him anyway; maybe you want to make him worse.
• Living a Lie: Whether you're undercover on a mission, or you lied to cover something up and now you have to commit, you're stuck playing a role until you accomplish some secret objective — or until you can shake off your nosy company.
• Loss of Control: For whatever reason, one of you is struggling not to go berserk — or perhaps has already failed. If it's Liem, can you help him come back to himself, or are you the one pushing him over the edge?
• Out of the Frying Pan: The classic "tried to help someone in trouble, ended up with a new and possibly worse problem" situation. But at least you're in it together!
• Priest/Celibacy: Default here is that Liem is the priest, but it could go the other way. Smutty, or just laden with UST? You decide.
• Texting: Stupid TFLN-style text threads, my beloved...
• Random Scenario: For if none of the above tickle your fancy.
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[ Cardan does not consider it to be the same. It's just that the set of choices they're presented with is both limited and complex. Liem is right: many of them lead to death. In the past, Cardan has sidestepped responsibility by choosing to do nothing at all.
But someone has seen fit to rob him of the option.
Having poured another glass, he will turn around to lean against the counter. ]
I will not mourn Dain if one of his many victims chooses to avenge themselves tomorrow. He has taken much from me and tried to take yet more. But if you are asking me to aid an assassination, my answer is still no.
[ Liem isn't the only obstinate creature in this room. Cardan levels an irritated gaze on him. ]
Think me unreasonable if you must.
[ His tone implies this is a challenge. ]
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That does not seem to be the case for Cardan. Liem does not understand how his husband can divorce himself from the consequences of crowning a brother he knows to seek Dain's blood, and yet feel responsible for the actions of a husband who is scarcely more than a stranger to him, but clearly it is simply the idea of causing Dain's death himself that bothers him.
So be it. He did not think his task would be easy when he first insisted on attempting it. If he is meant to protect what remains of his husband's innocence along with his life, then he will attempt the challenge to the best of his ability.
He sighs, aiming his gaze away from Cardan's annoyed one.]
Then we will do this your way, though I cannot say I have any experience with crowning someone.
[As opposed to certain other activities not fit for civilized discussion.]
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For once, he doesn't gloat. ]
Then we both ought to learn.
[ And so they do. In addition to the -- indeed -- truly astonishing amount of extra work the decision brings, Cardan finds himself in the strange and new role of an instructor. He pulls his old textbooks off the shelves of his study: histories and ballads of Mab's fabled conquests, of her progeny and their progeny thereafter. He instructs his husband in the intricacies of Faerie etiquette and the minutiae of century-long feuds. He retells the story of Eldred's exiling the old Alderking and how the new Alderking, Severin, killed his own father in a duel to take his throne. Cardan speaks of each of his siblings and their influence over the High Court, though he studiously avoids details of his own childhood. All along, there are still revels to attend and regular business to conduct, not to mention time for themselves, which Cardan insists on, even if it is just coiling himself around Liem in the dark of late morning to steal a few lingering kisses and the pleasure of skin against skin.
It's exhausting, which is probably why he's tired all the time.
On this particular evening, he has spent the better part of an hour staring at a pile of incomprehensible receipts. Gusairne had dumped the avalanche of paper in his lap with the scornful implication that Cardan was too stupid to do some simple accounting math. At this point in the game, Cardan suspects it would indeed be easier to find the wretched vampire and toss him in a lake together with the evidence.
He elects to go in search of more wine instead. On his way to the cellars, however, something strange strikes him: the air is different, and in a way unfamiliar to him -- there is a crisp dryness his nose cannot place. He notes a servant walk by with dampness atop the crown of her head and asks her whether it's storming outside.
Fifteen minutes later, he bursts into Liem's study and stalks up to his desk to put hands all over his papers. ]
Cancel your meetings, [ Cardan will demand, in the tone he usually reserves for demands of a royal nature. ] There is snow, and I wish to go see it.
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Likewise, a persistent and aching loneliness seems to have taken root in him, and what moments of intimacy they manage to steal only serve to make it worse. Liem can only be glad that Iago did not notice his discontent in the day following his discussion with Cardan, when he'd cloistered himself again in his office to weather the worst of the sting; he does not know what he would have said to his father then if he had swooped upon him with his familiar brand of comfort. He does not trust himself to have refused him.
It matters little. There is nothing to do but continue or admit defeat altogether, and he has already made his decision where that possibility is concerned. At least the work keeps him too busy to dwell on pointless things, which in his view is one of work's primary benefits. He is deep in the midst of planning for an upcoming dinner his father is hosting, up to his eyeballs in details for the menu and entertainments, when his husband bursts into his office looking considerably more animated than when he'd left.]
… is there?
[He blinks up at Cardan, wearing a mild, vaguely confused expression. He hadn't expected it to snow yet, with the solstice still some weeks away, but even in autumn he wouldn't typically consider this news to be worth more than mild interest.
After another moment, he seems to register fully what Cardan had said.]
Cancel them?
[To go look at snow?]
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[ Sometimes, for all his competence, Liem is spectacularly slow on the uptake. But Cardan is too enthralled by the weather to be excessively annoyed by it -- just impatient. He will move around the desk and attempt to tug his workaholic spouse out of his seat and against him, grinning his most charming grin. ]
Better yet, have your seneschal earn his keep and cancel them for you.
[ --well. Perhaps not all of it is merely excitement. He's at times felt tension between them in the weeks after the attempted assassination, and chalked it up to Liem regretting his choice to take on Cardan's burdens. Now and then, Cardan has had to clamp down on the urge to ask him whether he was truly sure this was the path he wanted.
He hadn't, because he's not certain he'd like the answer. Besides, it seems pointless.
So the snow is as good an excuse as any. And it's not like he isn't looking forward to it -- Elfhame's winters are exceedingly mild. Most of the snowflakes he'd seen had been in the elaborate braids of trolls visiting from the North, who seemed to carry their chill with them. ]
We are due for an expedition, lest you forget what the world outside this study looks like.
[ And the last time they went out on an adventure in the woods, the result had been surprisingly positive. Perhaps Cardan can hope for more of the same. ]
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I recall what snow looks like, thank you.
[He objects drily, even as he slides an arm automatically around Cardan's waist. He doesn't need a reminder of what the outdoors are like — but it is difficult to weather his husband's charming insistence and tempting forest scent and not wish to follow him outside to disappear into the woods. He has spent so much time in his office of late that he doesn't even register its familiar leather-and-paper smell anymore, and the sameness of it might be driving him just a little insane.
Well, the estate will not fall into shambles if he takes a night off, just this once.]
… But very well. Since it's the first one of the season, let us go see your snow.
[Gusairne has been looking a little too smug of late regardless. Perhaps it will help him stay humble to weather their surprise absence.]
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You can tell me if it looks as it should, then.
[ And, before Liem can change his mind, Cardan will turn around and pull him outside the study.
He will have to be reminded to bundle up. Most of their excursions from and to the carriage are hardly worth throwing on an overcoat for, but this time, his valet insists on gloves, a scarf, and tall boots in addition to a coat that is less sleek but significantly heavier. Cardan even accepts a fur-trimmed hat, though he wears it rakishly askew in deference to style.
Having been sufficiently protected from the chill, he will herd Liem outside. He had taken a peek out one of the few windows the estate has, only to spot surprisingly fat, lazy snowflakes falling over a landscape gentled by the accumulation of snow -- an exciting amount of it. It has, evidently, been snowing for a while.
He wonders what it will look like in the woods and whether they ought to take the faerie horses out for a ride. ]
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There is more snow on the ground than he'd been expecting. The earliness of the season had made him suppose they would walk outside into a light flurry, but the night air is filled with fat, fluffy snowflakes, and the landscape is already blanketed in a heavy blanket of white. He stops after only a few steps, calf-deep in snow, to regard the transformation that has been wrought upon the manor grounds.]
I did not realize there would be this much of it. It must have been storming all day.
[Even for him, familiar as he is with snowy winters, the sight is pleasantly surprising. His expression brightens visibly with satisfaction as he looks out toward the treeline and then back at Cardan.]
Does it never snow at all in Elfhame?
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Perhaps he should have done this sooner. ]
Not like this.
[ He reaches out to pluck a snowflake, fat as a bumblebee, from Liem's shoulder-- though when he tries to examine it, it only falls apart, becoming significantly diminished in the process. ]
The moods of the monarch affect the weather, and Eldred has not much patience for storms nor cold snaps.
[ But that's neither here nor there. He shakes the last of the snow off his fingers and smiles at Liem, pleased to have surprised him despite his initial skepticism. ]
I want to see the forest.
[ That is true, but he also wishes to be away from the house. The past few weeks have made him rather aware of Iago's presence permeating every room. Of course, it was ever his father-in-law's household; it's just that Cardan has never had so many reasons to avoid his attention. ]
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Would he ever see nights like this, if the weather changed according to his mood? He doubts it. He is so obsessed with consistency in his life that he cannot imagine it would storm any more often here than in Elfhame were that the case. And that would be a shame, for all that he doubts he could be any other way.
Fortunately, Liem is not in charge of moderating the weather; and fortunately, he is married to a man who will drag him out in it whether or not it's convenient to do so.]
Then we shall.
[He returns his smile, and starts moving again, taking Cardan's arm in his as he crunches through the untrodden snow. Already snowflakes are coming to roost in his hair; he'll likely become covered in them if they spend much longer outside the cover of the trees.]
Perhaps we could ride? There are trails we could follow deeper into the wood.
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[ He's still not used to this strange companionability -- which is stupid because they're married, but perfectly sensical when looking at the strange and twisted path their betrothal had taken them on. Regardless, Cardan will follow where his husband leads him, which is presumably to the stables. The giant moth is sleeping -- the low temperatures having put it into something like hibernation. No matter; the skies would have been uncomfortably cold, Cardan thinks.
Horses it is. Regardless of how amusing it might have been to revisit Liem holding on to him for dear life.
The snow continues to fall relentlessly as they make their way to the tree line. Cardan is lucky -- as with their previous excursion, the moon is full and bright, and though clouds cover it, enough light shines through them to be reflected off the soft white cover. The wood itself looks transformed; Cardan will reach out to brush fingers along an overhanging brand and laugh when it dumps the accumulated snow onto his head, spilling icy powder into his hair and down his collar. He doesn't mind; it's less chilly outside than the servants made him anticipate, and he's sure he'll find a way to keep warm, regardless.
He wishes to pull the same trick on Liem, but that would give away the greater of his plans for merriment, and it is not time for that yet. ]
It's so quiet, [ he says instead. There are sounds -- the far-away snap of a branch under the weight, the ever-present whispers of night creatures -- but the wood seems as wrapped in a duvet, muffled and peaceful. Even their own noises seem muted against it. ]
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It has been some time since he took a ride through the forest. Too long, he decides as they fetch the handsome faerie horses and ride out to the edge of the wood. He had been so busy in the weeks leading up to his wedding, and scarcely less so after it was done. But when he glances over at Cardan to see him alight with laughter and coated in a heavy dusting of snow, and he thinks of all the time they'd spent dancing uselessly around each other in the first weeks of their union, he can't help but feel that he's been thoroughly wasting his time.]
It is. That's one of my favourite things about fresh snowfall.
[Some of the nighttime creatures hide from the chill, as well, so the forest always seems so still after a good, heavy snow. It is very different from the bustle of the estate, which always sounds faintly of creaking floors, groaning pipes, and people moving about their duties.]
It can be very bright, too, when it's clear. Not like daylight, but still very lovely.
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Thankfully, Cardan is exactly as obnoxious as he needs to be. ]
It's lovely now, and you ought to listen to me more often.
[ Of course, if Liem did, they would probably end up in far more trouble than they already are. But sometimes Cardan thinks that would be worth it for moments like these. ]
Well? Shall we find your hill, Master Liem?
[ He'll make an exaggerated little bow, deeply courtly and distinctly unserious. It almost loses him his hat. ]
I am at your mercy in these unfamiliar woods.
[ That's not exactly accurate in terms of the woods; even in the alien snowscape, he feels more at home than he ever had inside four walls. But it is true when it comes to his husband, in more ways than one. ]
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You are so cheeky this evening.
[Cardan can be such a menace, but he prefers him like this, unruly and in good humour, to tired and irritable, as he too often has been of late. Liem is used to working himself to the bone, but it seems wrong that his husband should be wearing himself out as well, even if recent circumstances have made it necessary.
He is not even bothered by Cardan's playful attempt at subservience, for all that he has stubbornly rejected similar overtures in the past. If there is mockery in the act, he is too content to mind it.]
Very well; let's not loiter. I'm sure the horses are keen to stretch their legs.
[Frankly so is he, so he leads them further into the trees with Cardan's requested destination in mind, eager to find the hillside that was so pleasantly green mere weeks ago. Often his visits there have been on foot, so the path he guides the horses on is somewhat winding by comparison, but it is a fine night and the forest is comfortably quiet around them, as if, like the daytime creatures, it too is sleeping.
He asks, curiously,] Are my family's woods very different from those you used to frequent?
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The Milkwood is rather more full of screams at this time of night, [ he'll finally offer. Sounds of pleasure and of pain alike, full of the light of distant bonfires and the discordant notes of faerie instruments carried on a sea breeze. ] But then everything in my home is... more. More vibrant. More dangerous. More alive.
[ If he's wistful about it, he doesn't take the time to dwell. Instead he'll glance at Liem with an arched eyebrow. ]
And there are no Folk in your woods. That's unusual.
[ Not a sprite nor an imp scurrying by, invisible to anyone without True Sight. He suspects the difference there is vampires, but without any of his kin to ask, it's hard to know for sure. ]
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Though perhaps it makes sense, in a slightly ironic way, that the woods in the domain of vampires would be safer than those of Cardan’s home. After all, most vampires prefer to stalk more civilized areas, where there are plenty of humans to drink from and well-furnished basements to rest in during the day. And nothing in these lands is more dangerous than the vampires who dwell here.
And of course the fae, with no fear of the sun and no love for iron, would prefer the shelter of the woods, with whatever dangers and thrills that might imply. But although these woods rarely see any vampires, it is no surprise that they are devoid also of fair folk visitors.]
If there were Folk staying here, my father would certainly expect them to pay rent.
[It’s a joke, though a rather dry one. Liem has always known his father to insist on having complete control over the lands in his domain; he would never allow fair folk to wander his forests ungoverned. But he has no wish to spend time discussing his father when they’ve finally managed to escape his house for the night.]
You have such interesting things to say about Faerie. I must admit, I am very curious to see it.
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He might find our payment more perilous than it is worth.
[ Though as amusing as the thought of Iago feuding with a tricksy hag (or something) (or other) may be, he thinks it is rather lucky that they have avoided the issue. They have enough problems on their hands without any extra complications.
He sighs, then tilts his head back once more to watch the fall of snow towards him, seemingly endless. With the house out of sight and the woods so strangely attired, he can almost believe they are entirely elsewhere. And though he is loath to speak about work here of all places, Liem's questions have reminded him of a necessary change in their plans. ]
I will have to go see Balekin.
[ If he wants some access to the wealth of Balekin's coffers, anyway. He had thought, for a while, that he could get away with a warm letter and much flattery, but the tone of his brother's return missiles has been distinctly frosty. For all his brutality, Balekin is not stupid; he knows Cardan wants something, and he would have him beg for it in person. ]
...but I could go alone, this time. Elfhame is rather overwhelming.
[ For a first time, he doesn't add, because it should be obvious. All the preparation had been with Fairfold in mind -- a smaller court, with a king more tolerant to the ways of Ironside. The High Court is a different beast entirely. ]
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What Cardan says next is less pleasing. A frown appears between Liem's brows as he considers first whether it would be safe for Cardan to go on such a trip without him, and then whether his coming along would actually be any help to his husband at all. It occurs to him that he might be suggesting that Liem stay home to avoid bringing along an inconvenient liability.
Liem hesitates, staring sternly into the wood as he considers.]
Would you… prefer to go alone?
[He would be lying if he claimed he was confident about navigating Elfhame's High Court, especially at this point; but when he feels anxiety about venturing there, it is because of the possible difficulties he might create for them, and for Cardan, if he were to make a misstep. Even now, despite the things he has heard about Faerie's courts, he still can't summon much worry for himself.]
I don't wish to cause trouble for us, but I will need to visit eventually.
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Instead of mentioning any of that, he says: ] It would be useful to have someone who can lie for me.
[ Assuming Liem can muster up the ability -- he's done well enough deceiving his father, at least, though Cardan still sometimes marvels at how truthful his husband chooses to be in situations where he absolutely does not have to. If Cardan himself could lie, he imagines he'd never speak an entirely truthful word again.
And there is another reason. He hesitates briefly. ]
And I cannot be certain that I won't be... [ how to put it ] ...delayed.
[ Not permanently, he's sure; that would be difficult to explain. But it would undoubtedly be easier to extract himself if keeping him also meant keeping Lord Talbott's son and heir from his rightful home. ]
The choice is yours. It is my home, and I would hardly be facing any novel hardships by going there.
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Which matters almost not at all in the scheme of things, considering that what he says next makes Liem's decision for him regardless.]
Then we will go together so you can pay your brother a visit.
[It should probably be a little bit frightening to make the decision; certainly crossing the ocean is going to be an ordeal all by itself. But he is only relieved, and the tone of his declaration is light.]
And I will have an opportunity to meet more of my in-laws.
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He's glad anyway. He reaches over to touch Liem's cheek with his gloved hand, his look considering. ]
We'll be keeping the tailors busy.
[ Of course they'll need new clothes, and Cardan intends to supervise Liem's. But-- he sighs and pulls back his hand. ]
It is appalling that you've gotten me to talk about such dreary affairs here. [ As if it's Liem's fault to begin with. ]
Besides, I can see the hill. Come.
[ He doesn't wait for an answer before urging his horse into taking off. The faerie steed is faster than regular horses and sure-footed even in these low-lit conditions, its silver-shod hooves flying through the snow as if they were made only for this.
Cardan raises his face to the brush of snowflakes and lets himself feel relief, if only for a moment. ]
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In any case, they needn't dwell on the future just now. Liem spurs his own mount on as Cardan's dashes ahead, making for the broad, snow-covered hill now rising up out of the cover of the trees. Despite the snow and the gloom, their journey here has been much swifter than he'd anticipated. These faerie steeds are quite fine indeed.
He arrives on Cardan's heels, reining in his horse at the edge of the tree line. He is much more familiar with the sight of this clearing as it is now, hidden beneath a snowy blanket, though the sight of fiery leaves still peering out from beneath their cloak of white is novel. Liem pauses a moment to let the view greet him, his gloved hand resting idly on his mount's neck.
His husband is right, of course. It is lovely.]
Ah. The snow is still untouched…
[The hillside is devoid even of animal tracks: just one smooth, uninterrupted sheet of glittering white. He is tempted to linger here, appreciating it from beneath the trees as the snow falls softly around — but he is more tempted to dismount and see just how thickly the snow has fallen here, so he climbs down to feel the snow crunch beneath his boots.]
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As he works the knots into compliance, he'll takes the opportunity to watch Liem rather than the large tree. His husband looks different in these surroundings -- smaller, perhaps a little lonelier, his slim silhouette stark against the blanket of white. But he also seems a little more at ease, just a touch less worn out by the myriad responsibilities he shoulders: towards his father, the household, towards Cardan himself. Cardan still cannot figure out why Liem insists on burdening himself this way, but--
No matter. He'll bend a little to stroke his horse's soft nose... and then duck lower, using her body to shield himself from view. Half a breath later, he steps out from behind her, a predatory gleam in his eyes, and winds up to chuck a snowball straight at his husband's head.
...well, surely Liem didn't expect him to refrain from mischief altogether. ]
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Pausing halfway towards the summit, Liem starts to turn back toward his spouse, but he stops short, tilting his head slightly as though listening for something. A moment later, Cardan's snowball slaps into his hair.]
Wh—
[He whirls, bringing one hand up to brush at the back of his head as icy powder slides down his collar. He fixes his husband with an incredulous grin.]
What nerve.
[Ambushing his husband from behind? Cardan really is shameless — and overbold. Liem stoops to scoop up a pile of snow, packing it into a throwing-sized ball.]
Stay put for a moment, husband.
[So Liem can pelt him more easily.]
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Suffice it to say the element of surprise was necessary. And how magnificent a surprise it is; his laugh rings through the snowy trees as he watches his missile hit its target, exploding magnificently against Liem's bare head.
For a half-breath, he wonders if the reaction he'll get is annoyance -- but then Liem's grin slices through the twilight between them, and Cardan's teeth flash in return, delighted as a cat with a bird. ]
No, I don't think I will, [ he'll call back, already dashing behind a tree. The thick layers he's dressed in -- and the unfamiliar obstacle of calf-high snow -- are an impediment, but exuberance will carry him through.
Though not for long, he imagines, as his quarry is undoubtedly approaching. Best to have another missile at the ready. ]
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